Tolkien, The Hobbit, The Lord of the Rings, Star Trek: TNG/DS9/VOY/ENT, Sherlock, Pacific Rim, X-Men (movieverse), MCU.

Occasionally NSFW.


Wear a hoodie or cardigan over the shirt, so you can keep it covered up until you feel comfortable to show it

That’s probably a good idea. I do love my combadge though, and it always sits on my jacket, but I guess I could cover that as well with a scarf. I usually wear a scarf anyway, unless it’s far too hot outside. (Note to self: wash scarf in advance. If it’s not clean, you will panic and spray it with perfume and smell like a walking beauty store for the rest of the day.)

Now that the phone call is dealt with, I need to prepare for going to a place and taking part in an activity. I will probably have at least one anxiety attack and/or reconnect with my psychosomatic stomach cramps, but the latter is usually manageable as long as I only move very slowly. My greatest fear is that I will start crying uncontrollably in front of the people at the place I’m going to. I guess the only thing I can do is to prepare as much as possible, instead of hiding from the fact that I’m going there next week and pretending it’s not going to happen. Consider this post a stern reminder to myself. I really do want to go to that place and meet those people and take part in that activity, so I need to get a hold of myself now.

I just made a phone call to a stranger. Excuse me while I flop like a fish on the pavement for a while.

Me: *licks own hand*

Me: Get out, I'm trying to describe a tongue.

Things I want to tell people, that I wish people had told me:


  • You don’t have to achieve great things by the time you’re 25
  • You have intrinsic value above and beyond your perceived utility to other people and society at large. 
  • You don’t have to have sex, or have sex in any way that you find uncomfortable or unpleasant, to keep anyone’s love or good opinion of you. They didn’t love you or think very well of you to start with if they demand it. 
  • You don’t have to stay with someone who isn’t meeting your emotional or sexual needs because they need you, or you’ve been with them for awhile, or you need to be in a relationship. You need you. Your time is your own and it is finite. 
  • It’s ok to work at a job you enjoy that doesn’t make you miserable even if it’s not a career and it won’t “lead to anything.” 
  • Your life is not a narrative. It is not leading to anything, there is no overarching thesis, it does not have themes beyond the usual shared cultural experiences of your time and place. This is ok. It does not mean that your life is without purpose or meaning. 
  • It’s ok not to like or get along with the vast majority of people you encounter, so long as you afford them the same respect, courtesy and dignity that they afford you. 
  • Expensive is not always better. 
  • Failure is temporary if you’re still alive. 
  • People are both much better and much worse than you’d suspect, but usually not all at once. 
  • Stop thinking of your future self as a different person and it will be easier to prevent money and health problems. 
  • Let people help you, lean on them when you need to, and be available to help, but don’t swing too far in either direction. Try to carry your half of the life basket as evenly as you can. 
  • Set boundaries, and do not be afraid to kick people out of your life who disregard them. You will not end up alone and unloved. People who love you will be ok with your boundaries. 
  • Your power does not come from money or beauty, but from seeing life steadily and wholly, from a curious and thoughtful mind, and from your ability to say no when you want to, and yes when you want to, and I don’t know when you don’t know. 
  • There will be bad times, maybe lots of bad times, but not only bad times. 
  • Love will not heal the wounds in your soul, but love can give you the impetus to begin the work of healing yourself. 
  • Life might be a long series of starting over, and that’s alright. 
  • You’re really cool, you’re really beautiful, you’re really special. Really. Not to everyone, but to a lot of someones sometimes.


(Source: sehnsuchttraum)


I found the best fucking song.

Lyrics under cut!

I Wanna See Pretty People Doing Ugly Things
by Möl Triffid

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Guess who bought this album on Ebay? :D

The booklet had lyrics in it, so the lyrics under cut are now corrected in the original post.

Please note that the white blurb to the left of the yellow planet at the top of the cover is the starship Enterprise.

I’m going to meet my new therapist today, and I must have an infection, because I’m so tired I can barely sit straight.

10 favorite ladies of trek [7/10]: lily sloane

  • even though lily sloane only appears in one star trek movie, first contact, she makes quite an impression. lily perfectly represents humanity in the mid twenty-first century in the star trek universe: she has survived brutal war that wiped out 600 million people and because of that is well-equipped to defend herself, her community, and the phoenix from what she initially perceives as air attacks by an enemy faction. lily is tough, loyal, smart, and adaptable; but she is also funny, kind, and open-minded. she is faced not only with the truth that there is other life in the universe but that some of that life is hostile, and although she is afraid, she also doesn’t just sit back and let everyone else take care of her. when captain picard decides to stay on the ship to fight the borg when everyone else knows it’s futile, she is the one who convinces him he is acting out of revenge and a personal vendetta instead of for the best interests of the crew. and despite being faced with the borg, lily still stands tall and brave when the vulcan ship lands and real first contact begins for humanity. an aeronautical engineer and close friend of zephram cochrane, lily would have been one of the most important humans on planet earth in the coming days of humanity’s steps toward a better future. we could not have hoped for a better representative.